Wednesday, May 7, 2008

We scooped up a bag of skittles , William and jumped in the van. Michelle handed me the keys and said "you drive" (kinda sounded like a bigger version of William!)
The drive to Maryland was great .It is beautiful up there , trees , grass ( green grass!!) , hills , farms , just picture perfect. I was really anxious to get there along with being scared.
Anxious because I had prayed that i would meet them someday then with John Eric being so sick , I had lost all hopes of ever seeing him.And scared because i knew what to expect when I 'd see him and I didn't know how I would handle it .BUT, I wasn't alone.
When I went in to see John Eric , I didn't panic , maybe just because it was all about John Eric , not about Ju or even less about me... I looked over at Haley a few times and her smile gave me strength .
A deep sadness filled my heart .As i looked into Jay's face, holding his baby boy, I thought how painful, yet beautiful it all was. Soooooooooo much love , yet so much pain, both of which are everlasting...
I will NEVER forget that image, it is forever engraved in my heart: Jay , sitting in the recliner ,holding John Eric in his arms looking down at his baby boy , smiling at him.
While I tended to Willbug for a few , Haley stayed with him , she saw John Eric fuss and cry for a little bit... Then he went back to sleep.
William found some little girls to play with. He was a hit !! amongst the little girls and the grand mas.... I didnt want him to see the baby at first , because i was afraid he would think it was juju...
They were passing the scrapbooks around .(pictures from their Disney trip...) I asked William if he wanted to meet John Eric. He decided that yeah sure he could do that, he kissed the baby's face and asked" Him sleeping?" i nodded and he went on to find toys... When I took him to the bathroom a while after that , he said to me " I like John Eric, he's my best friend"Was hard to hold the tears back...I think I have underestimated you , Willliam " you were brave!! "
We spent a couple of hours there , just looking at J.E. , touching with him , rubbing his little head and talking to him .

It was so saaaaad to have to go . he is a little magnet ...

Thank you so much guys for the warm welcome, the laughter, the tears , the pizza , the lasagna (with special ingredients !!) , and mainly for the love and peace that could be felt all the way home ...

Hugs to you guys


Laurie said...


What a beautiful little guy! Thank you for sharing him with me. I'm glad your visit went well...and that you had a good time with Haley and the gang!!

Talk to you soon,

themacdonnells said...

Mimi, you are a true inspiration to me! I hope I get to meet you one day! Maybe you can come out to the Grand Prairie Relay and see us. Lukas will be the Grand Marshall of the Survivor lap.

(oh, and I'm stealing your idea of putting names on my shirt, just a heads up!)


The Journey Begins Here said...

Hey Girl,

Thinking about you.

Love T

AlaneM said...

Hi Mimi,
Just stopping by to tell you I tagged you for a meme...please don't shoot!! :)
Blessings to you.

My boys are Army Brats said...

Just catching up with your blog again!

I went to Maryland last week too. I'm not a big fan of the long drive and yours was even longer! You're so awesome to go all that way to meet another child who's family has touched your life!